Chapters

The first years, Chapter one, I call the age of innocence and bliss during which time I experienced lots of love and affirmation from my family and those around me. This lasted, strange to say, until I was about 25 years old. This worked for me, and I wish others could have a similar benefit. It was not the love and affirmation which ceased... it never did... and it continues to this day.

Chapter two I call the age of conflict and romance. I must say there is always conflict in life, and there was before this age when this chapter begins. The real change here is the romance, because at this stage of my life, I met the most wonderful woman ever, and had to make many adjustments against seemingly great odds to pursue this love. Together we decided to forge a life, despite the difficulties. I followed the advice of my father: Do what is good for yourself, even if it may not be what others may expect. And the sage quip of my brother, scribbled on a card in a gift of a cowboy belt with a huge buckle "Be daring!" The buckle really hurt when I wore it, which wasn't too often. Love and affirmation from family and friends continued.

Chapter three can be called the age of love and understanding. This is a progression from the previous stage where the fruit of romance becomes a deep and abiding love.We learned much from each other and our love deepened. We worked together, had lunch togeter, shared the chores, switching off on laundry and the dishes. We had common funds, tried nefer to out do one another at gift times, and made Valentines Day and anniversaries fun instead of gotcha times.We raised two exciting children, who continue the excitement part to this day.

I wrote those three chapter headings almost ten years ago. I thought they would suffice for the rest of my life... I mean what can happen after love and understanding.

Today I would call the fourth chapter Caring love and loving care. It has grown to become about 25% of our married life. It has challenged me to learn so much about advocacy, care giving, medicine, and so much more that I wish I did not have to learn. But I have learned about myself too, and what it takes to carry on with hope and a dream. I do not think about what's next, but I still believe that I will live ten years longer than my father did. That chapter should be a doozy..